Michael was an avid golfer with such an arrogant attitude that when he passed away, few people shed a tear. Michael approached the Pearly Gates, where St. Peter was waiting for him. St. Peter asked, “Michael, do you think you deserve to enter Heaven?” Michael replied, “I’m such a good golfer, I think I should go to Heaven.” St. Peter decided to test Michael’s claim and asked him to demonstrate his skills. Michael teed up a ball and took a mighty swing. The ball soared off into the clouds, straight towards the Pearly Gates. Just as it was about to land, a gust of wind blew it off course and it landed in Hell. St. Peter shook his head and said, “Sorry, Michael, you’ll have to go to Hell.” Michael protested, “But I’m such a good golfer!” St. Peter replied, “Yes, but this is Heaven. We don’t have a golf course here.

Here’s another one: Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one.