Day Brightener – Punography

  • PunI tried to catch some fog…..I mist.
  • When chemists die….They barium.
  • Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
  • A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray…Is now a seasoned veteran
  • I know a guy who’s addicted to brake fluid…He says he can stop anytime.
  • How does Moses make his tea ?…..Hebrews it.
  • I stayed up all night to see where the sun went….Then it dawned on me.
  • This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club..But I never met herbivore.
  • I’m reading a book about inti-gravity…..I can’t put it down.
  • I did a theatrical performance about puns…..It was a play on words.
  • They told me I had type A blood…But it was a type O.
  • A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
  • PMS jokes aren’t funny….Period !
  • Why were the Indians here first ?….They had reservations.
  • Class trip to the Coca Cola factory…..I hope there’s no pop quiz.
  • Energizer Bunny arrested……Charged with battery.
  • I didn’t like my beard at first….Then it grew on me.
  • How do you make Holy water ?….Boil the hell out of it.
  • What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary ?…A thesaurus.
  • When you get a bladder infection….urine trouble.
  • What does a clock do when it is hungry ?..It goes back for seconds.
  • I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger….And then it hit me.
  • Broken pencils are pointless.

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