Day Brightener – Kids Say The Darndest Things!

Kids sayI think it was Art Linkletter that said “Kids Say The Darndest Things” and later there was a TV show with Bill Cosby. The items below prove the point.

  1. This is a picture of an octopus. It has eight, testicles. (Kelly, age 6 )
  2. Oysters’ balls are called pearls. (Jerry, age 6)
  3. If you are surrounded by ocean, you are an island. If you don’t, have ocean all round you, you are incontinent. (Mike, age 7)
  4. Sharks are ugly and mean, and have big teeth, just like Emily Richardson. She’s not my friend anymore. (Kylie, age 6)
  5. A dolphin breaths through an asshole on the top of its head. (Billy, age 8)
  6. My uncle goes out in his boat with 2 other men and a woman and
    pots and comes back with crabs. (Millie, age 6)
  7. When ships had sails, they used to use the trade winds to cross
    the ocean. Sometimes when the wind didn’t blow the sailors would
    whistle to make the wind come. My brother said they would have been
    better off eating beans. (William, age 7)
  8. Mermaids live in the ocean. I like mermaids. They are beautiful
    and I like their shiny tails, but how on earth do mermaids get
    pregnant? Like, really? (Helen, age 6)
  9. I’m not going to write about the ocean. My baby brother is always
    crying, my Dad keeps yelling at my Mom, and my big sister has just got
    pregnant, so I can’t think what to write. (Amy, age 6)
  10. Some fish are dangerous. Jellyfish can sting. Electric eels can
    give you a shock. They have to live in caves under the sea where I
    think they have to plug themselves into chargers. (Christopher, age
  11. When you go swimming in the ocean, it is very cold, and it makes
    my willy small. (Kevin, age 6)
  12. Divers have to be safe when they go under the water. Divers
    can’t go down alone, so they have to go down on each other. (Becky,
    age 8)
  13. On vacation, my Mom went water skiing. She fell off when she was
    going very fast. She says she won’t do it again because water fired
    right up her big fat ass. (Julie, age 7)
  14. The ocean is made up of water and fish. Why the fish don’t drown
    I don’t know. (Bobby, age 6)
  15. My dad was a sailor on the ocean. He knows all about the ocean.
    What he doesn’t know is why he quit being a sailor and married my mom.
    (James, age 7)

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