Day Brightener – Word Play Humor For Lexophiles (Lovers Of Words)

words

  • How does Moses make tea?…….. Hebrews it.
  • Venison for dinner again?……. Oh deer!
  • A cartoonist was found dead in his home……. Details are sketchy.
  • I used to be a banker, but then…….. I lost interest.
  • Haunted French pancakes give me,…… The crêpes.
  • England has no kidney bank, but it does have,……. A Liverpool.
  • I tried to catch some fog, …….but I mist.
  • They told me I had type-A blood, but………. It was a Typo.
  • I changed my iPod’s name to Titanic……… It’s syncing now.
  • Jokes about German sausage……. Are the wurst.
  • I know a guy who’s addicted to brake fluid, but he says,……. He can stop any time.
  • I stayed up all night to see where the sun went, ……..and then it dawned on me.
  • This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, ……..but I’d never met herbivore.
  • When chemists die,…….. They barium.
  • I’m reading a book about anti-gravity…….. I just can’t put it down.
  • I did a theatrical performance about puns. ……… It was a play on words.
  • Why were the Indians here first? ……… They had reservations.
  • I didn’t like my beard at first………. Then it grew on me.
  • Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher who lost her job because……. She couldn’t control her pupils?
  • When you get a bladder infection,…… Urine trouble.
  • Broken pencils are…….. Pointless.
  • What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary?……. A thesaurus.
  • I dropped out of communism class because of lousy…….. Marx.
  • ll the toilets in New York’s police stations have been stolen…….. The police have nothing to go on.
  • I got a job at a bakery because…. I kneaded dough.
  • Velcro …… What a rip off!
  • Don’t worry about old age; it doesn’t last.

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