‘I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph.’ ShirleyTemple
‘Let me see if I’ve got this Santa business straight. You say he wears a beard, has no discernible source of income and flies to cities all over the world under cover of darkness? You sure this guy isn’t laundering illegal drug money?’ TomArmstrong
‘Santa Claus wears a Red Suit, he must be a communist. And a beard and long hair, must be a pacifist. What’s in that pipe that he’s smoking?’ ArloGuthrie
Why is Christmas just like a day at the office? You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit. Anonymous
You know you’re getting old, when Santa starts looking younger. Robert Paul
Who’s the bane of Santa’s life? The elf and safety officer. Catherine Tate
‘Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people once a year.’
VictorBorge