There was a middle-aged guy who bought a Mercedes convertible. He took off down the road, flooring it up to 80 mph and enjoying the wind blowing through what little hair he had left on his head.
“This is great,” he thought and floored it some more. He looked in his rearview mirror and there was a State Patrol behind him, blue lights flashing and siren blasting. “I can get away from him with no problem” thought the man and he floored it some more and flew down the road at over 100 mph.
Then he thought, “What am I doing? I’m too old for this kind of thing,” and pulled over to the side of the road and waited for the State Patrol to catch up with him.
The State Patrol officer pulled in behind the Mercedes and the officer walked up to the man. “Sir,” he said, looking at his watch. “My shift ends in 30 minutes and today is Friday the 13th. If you can give me a reason why you were speeding that I’ve never heard before, I’ll let you go.” The man looked back at the State Patrol and said, “Last week my wife ran off with a State Patrol officer, and I thought you were bringing her back!”
The State Patrol said, “Have a nice day!”