- Writing my name in cursive is my signature move.
- Why do bees stay in their hives during winter? Swarm.
- If you’re bad at haggling, you’ll end up paying the price.
- Just so everyone is clear, I’m going to put my glasses on.
- A commander walks into a bar and orders everyone around.
- I lost my job as a stage designer. I left without making a scene.
- Never buy flowers from a monk. Only you can prevent florist friars.
- How much did the pirate pay to get his ears pierced? A buccaneer.
- My friends and I have named our band ‘Duvet’. It’s a cover band.
- I lost my girlfriend’s audiobook, and now I’ll never hear the end of it.
- Why is ‘dark’ spelled with a k and not c? Because you can’t see in the dark.
- Why is it unwise to share your secrets with a clock? Well, time will tell.
- Scientists got together to study the effects of alcohol on a person’s walk, and the result was staggering.
Loren Berg's Blog 