A Sign In A Shoe Repair Store:
We will heel you
We will save your sole
We will even dye for you.
Sign Over A Gynecologist’s Office:
“Dr. Jones, at your cervix.”
In a Podiatrist’s office:
“Time wounds all heels.”
On a Septic Tank Truck:
Yesterday’s Meals on Wheels
At an Optometrist’s Office:
“If you don’t see what you’re looking for, You’ve come to the right place.”
On a Plumber’s truck:
“We repair what your husband fixed.”
On another Plumber’s truck:
“Don’t sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.”
At a Tire Shop
“Invite us to your next blowout.”
On an Electrician’s truck:
“Let us remove your shorts.”
In a Non-smoking Area:
“If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and will take appropriate action.”
On a Maternity Room door:
“Push. Push. Push.”
At a Car Dealership:
“The best way to get back on your feet – miss a car payment.”
Outside a Muffler Shop:
No appointment necessary. We hear you coming.
In A Veterinarian’s Waiting Room:
“Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!”.
At the Electric Company:
“We would be delighted if you send in your payment on time. However, if you don’t, YOU will be de-lighted.”.
In a Restaurant window:
“Don’t stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up.”.
In the front yard of a Funeral Home:
“Drive carefully. We’ll wait.”.
At a Propane Filling Station:
“Thank Heaven for little grills.”.
In a Radiator Shop:
“Best place in town to take a leak.”.
And the best one for last….
Sign on the back of another Septic Tank Truck:
“Caution – This Truck is full of Political Promises”