1. A girl is said to be grown up when she starts wearing a bra. A boy is grown up when he starts removing it
2. We all love to spend money buying new clothes but we never realize that the best moments in life are enjoyed without clothes
3. Having a cold drink on hot day with a few friends is nice, but having a hot friend on a cold night after a few drinks is priceless
4. Breaking News: Condoms don’t guarantee safe sex anymore. A friend of mine was wearing one when he was shot dead by the woman’s husband
5. Arguing over a girl’s bust size is like choosing between Molson, Heineken, Coors and Budweiser. Men may state their preferences, but will grab whatever is available.
THE 5 ANSWERS YOU HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR:
1. Q: WHAT IS AN AUSTRALIAN KISS?
A: It’s the same as a French kiss, but ‘downunder’.
2. Q: WHAT DO YOU DO WITH 365 USED CONDOMS?
A: Melt them down, make a tire, and call it a Goodyear
3. Q: WHY WERE HURRICANES ORIGINALLY NAMED AFTER WOMEN?
A: Because when they come, they’re wet and wild, and when they go, they take your house and car with them.
4. Q: WHY DO GIRLS RUB THEIR EYES WHEN THEY GET UP IN THE MORNING?
A: Because they don’t have any balls to scratch.
BONUS QUESTION & ANSWER
Q: What is a man’s Ultimate embarrassment?
A: Running into a wall with an erection and breaking his nose.
Nominated as the world’s best short joke:
A 3-year-old boy examined his testicles while taking a bath.
“Mom”, he asked, “Are these my brains?”
“Not yet,” she replied