Day Brightener – Dating Ads For Seniors, Found In A Florida Newspaper

‘The Villages’ Dating Ads You can say what you want about Florida, but you never hear of anyone retiring and moving north. These are actual ads seen in ”The Villages”  Florida newspaper. Who says seniors don’t have a  sense of humor?

FOXY  LADY
Sexy,  fashion-conscious blue-haired beauty, 80’s, slim, 5’4′ (used to be 5’6′). Searching for sharp-looking, sharp-dressing companion. Matching white shoes and belt a plus.

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LONG-TERM COMMITMENT
Recent widow who has just buried fourth husband, Looking for someone to round out a six-unit plot. Dizziness,  fainting, shortness of breath, not a problem.

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SERENITY NOW
I  am into solitude, long walks, sunrises, the ocean, yoga, and meditation. If you are the silent type, let’s get together, take our hearing aids out and enjoy quiet times.

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WINNING  SMILE
Active grandmother with original teeth seeking a dedicated flosser to share rare steaks, Corn on the cob and caramel candy.

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BEATLES  OR STONES
 still like to rock, still like to cruise in my Camaro on  Saturday nights and still like to play the guitar. If you were a groovy chick, or are now a groovy hen, let’s  get together and listen to my eight-track tapes.

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MEMORIES
I  can usually remember Monday through Thursday. If you can remember Friday, Saturday and Sunday, let’s put our two heads together.

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MINT CONDITION
Male,  1932 model, high mileage, good condition, some hair, many new parts including hip, knee, cornea, valves. Isn’t in running condition, but walks well.

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AND FINALLY
A  lady in the Villages in Florida (a senior retirement community), was sitting on a bench, near another bench with a gentleman sitting on the bench.  She asked him if he was new to the community and he said: “no, I have owned a condo here for 20 years”. She then said, “I have been here for 15 years and I have never seen you around!”. He then said, “I have been in prison for the last 17 years!”. She was stunned and finally asked him what he had done. He said that he had murdered his first wife! She was stunned again and after a long pause, she said… So you’re SINGLE???

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Do not regret growing old, it is a privilege denied to many.

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