If you have ever made a “Customer Service” call, you’ve talked to this guy.

Mujibar was trying to get a job in India.

The Personnel Manager said, ‘Mujibar, you have passed all the tests, except one.  Unless you pass it, you cannot qualify for this job.’

Mujibar said, ‘I am ready.’

The manager said,’Make a sentence  using the words Yellow, Pink, and Green .’

Mujibar said,

‘The telephone goes green, green, and  I pink it up, and  say, Yellow,  this is Mujibar.’

Mujibar now works at a call center.

Now you know!

A man and a woman in a hot air balloon realized they were lost. They lowered their altitude and spotted a man in a boat below.

The woman shouted to him, “Excuse me, can you help us?  We promised friends we would meet them an hour ago, but we don’t know where we are.”

The man consulted his portable GPS and replied, “You’re in a hot air balloon, approximately 30 feet above ground elevation of 2,346 feet above sea level.  You are at 31 degrees, 14.97 minutes north latitude and 100 degrees, 49.09 minutes west longitude.

She rolled her eyes and said, “You must be a Republican.”

“I am,” replied the man. “How did you know?”

“Well,” answered the balloonist, “everything you told me is technically correct.  But I have no idea what to do with your information, and we’re still lost.  Frankly, you’ve not been much help to us.”

The man smiled and responded, “You must be a Democrat.”

“We both are,” replied the balloonist.  “How did you know?”

“Well,” said the man, “you don’t know where you are – or where you are going.  You’ve risen to where you are, due to a large quantity of hot air.  You made a promise you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem.  You’re in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but somehow, now it’s my fault.”

Dear God, please send clothes for all those poor ladies on grandpa’s computer. Amen

I will seek and find you.

I shall take you to bed, and have my way with you.

I will make you ache, shake, & sweat until you moan & groan.

I will make you beg for mercy, beg for me to stop.

I will exhaust you to the point that you will be relieved when I’m finished with you.

And, when I am finished, you will be weak for days.

All my love,
The Flu

P.S. Now, stop thinking about sex and think about getting your flu shot